Post by Moments In Life on Oct 3, 2017 19:56:03 GMT -5
October 1st, 2017
Atlanta, GA
Trapp’s Apartment
12:22 PM
(On-Camera)
Atlanta, GA
Trapp’s Apartment
12:22 PM
(On-Camera)
Man I don’t know what the fuck I was about to get myself into. My sister just hit my phone asking if she could come to Atlanta and stay for a bit which I was cool with because she got my nieces and nephews and I’d do anything for them but Jalen been coming at me hard about moving back in with him.
And even though I didn’t trust that nigga fully, that was my nigga so I was trying to see if we could work this shit out. He the only nigga I’ve ever been with and the fact we got years in meant something to a nigga. I mean this dude has seen me at my worst and even the shit with my moms he’s experienced her at her bad moments.
So I had no choice but to fuck with the kid, I sat back and thought about the shit We was dealing with even wrote a rap about the shit and I realized I have to take ownership in the part I played because I was playing with the nigga emotions.
Shit a nigga confused as fuck right now, but if I was about to let my sister come stay here then I rather she keep my spot occupied and I just stay with Jalen and see how that goes.
The scene opens up inside of Trapp’s apartment, Trapp is shown sitting at the table eating a bowl of cereal and talking to his sister Amaya on the phone.
TRAPP: Nah I put the money in ya account and I’ll just buy the tickets, we can fly the car down here or something.
AMAYA: I appreciate this so much Ashaan. It’s so much going on here and I need to get away from mom. I let her stay here and she stole from me, I couldn’t believe it.
TRAPP: The drugs really messing her up, I peeped that the last time I was in Philly and she showed up at the crib asking for money. I gave her a couple hundred, I didn’t even count it.
AMAYA: The house is a mess, and she has different people in and out of the house. I don’t think you should pay for it anymore.
TRAPP: Nah at the end of the day that’s my mother so I would never see her out on the street, but I have cut back on what I give her a month. I want her to get better so I guess I have to show her tough love, I just wish I had that old mom, the one who worked and lived a clean life.
AMAYA: Well blame Jerrod for that, that nigga fucked her whole life up.
TRAPP: Speaking of that nigga, where is he at? I was hoping I would run into his ass when I was in Philly but I guess he heard I was in town so he was ducking me.
AMAYA: He don’t really come around anymore and the last time I heard anything about him he was filing for divorce from mom. He’s in the church now and has got his life together but refuses to help the woman he ruined, I don’t like that nigga.
TRAPP: He’ll get what he deserves I wouldn’t even sweat it and I’m sure I’ll see him sooner than later. But yea I’m over here packing my shit up right now, I’m going to let you keep the furniture and TV’s since Jalen already got them at his crib, I got security installed but this a nice neighborhood so don’t much go on around here.
AMAYA: Whoa wait! So you’re moving back in with Jalen? Are you sure that’s a good idea? I mean the boy basically outed you to the world and then embarrassed you after the fact by messing with another guy, I don’t think that’s a good idea.
TRAPP: Yo I’ve been rocking with dude for a minute now, yea the way I was outed was fucked up but I would have eventually had to do it one way or another and when he messed with dude we wasn’t together, it’s how he handled it after the fact was fucked up. Chill sis just give him a chance, he not a bad dude.
AMAYA: I don’t know Ashaan, I just think he’s a little messy that’s all. But I won’t cut him out just yet, I always remember him being around when we’re growing up but people changes as they get older.
TRAPP: If it don’t work then I can walk away saying I tried and move on with my life. I can always come back here and pick things back up, my mindset is in a totally different place right now and I rather you and the kids have your own space.
AMAYA: Once I start working again bro, I promise I’ll pay you back.
TRAPP: Chill sis, I got you. Let me finish up here though because I’m going to Jalen’s house in a little bit. I’ll get the tickets today and I’ll cash app you some money to hold you down and we can get you out here sometime this week.
AMAYA: As much as I am angry at mom, I think I should tell her though.
TRAPP: That’s your decision, she’ll probably blame me and say I’m taking everyone away from her but who wants to be around and watch her self destruct.
AMAYA: You are right, I probably won’t see her anyway since I told her I didn’t have any money for her. But I’ll let you go and I’ll see you soon.
Like I said before I would do anything for my sister, with all the shit going on in both of our lives she was always one person I could count on. I remember coming out to her, she really didn’t believe me at first and then she asked me if I was sure.
I told her Nah but I did tell her that I was messing with Jalen, she thought it was cute but with her finding out it was only making me uncomfortable. The way my sister found out was she saw a text Jalen had sent me and you sexting is huge when you young. I told her what was good and she promised me she wouldn’t say anything.
As she didn’t.
Shit she was helping me sneak Jalen in the crib at night sometimes. So she has the same love for the kid she just don’t like how he went about things but that was up to her if she wanted to forgive him or not.
And even though I didn’t trust that nigga fully, that was my nigga so I was trying to see if we could work this shit out. He the only nigga I’ve ever been with and the fact we got years in meant something to a nigga. I mean this dude has seen me at my worst and even the shit with my moms he’s experienced her at her bad moments.
So I had no choice but to fuck with the kid, I sat back and thought about the shit We was dealing with even wrote a rap about the shit and I realized I have to take ownership in the part I played because I was playing with the nigga emotions.
Shit a nigga confused as fuck right now, but if I was about to let my sister come stay here then I rather she keep my spot occupied and I just stay with Jalen and see how that goes.
The scene opens up inside of Trapp’s apartment, Trapp is shown sitting at the table eating a bowl of cereal and talking to his sister Amaya on the phone.
TRAPP: Nah I put the money in ya account and I’ll just buy the tickets, we can fly the car down here or something.
AMAYA: I appreciate this so much Ashaan. It’s so much going on here and I need to get away from mom. I let her stay here and she stole from me, I couldn’t believe it.
TRAPP: The drugs really messing her up, I peeped that the last time I was in Philly and she showed up at the crib asking for money. I gave her a couple hundred, I didn’t even count it.
AMAYA: The house is a mess, and she has different people in and out of the house. I don’t think you should pay for it anymore.
TRAPP: Nah at the end of the day that’s my mother so I would never see her out on the street, but I have cut back on what I give her a month. I want her to get better so I guess I have to show her tough love, I just wish I had that old mom, the one who worked and lived a clean life.
AMAYA: Well blame Jerrod for that, that nigga fucked her whole life up.
TRAPP: Speaking of that nigga, where is he at? I was hoping I would run into his ass when I was in Philly but I guess he heard I was in town so he was ducking me.
AMAYA: He don’t really come around anymore and the last time I heard anything about him he was filing for divorce from mom. He’s in the church now and has got his life together but refuses to help the woman he ruined, I don’t like that nigga.
TRAPP: He’ll get what he deserves I wouldn’t even sweat it and I’m sure I’ll see him sooner than later. But yea I’m over here packing my shit up right now, I’m going to let you keep the furniture and TV’s since Jalen already got them at his crib, I got security installed but this a nice neighborhood so don’t much go on around here.
AMAYA: Whoa wait! So you’re moving back in with Jalen? Are you sure that’s a good idea? I mean the boy basically outed you to the world and then embarrassed you after the fact by messing with another guy, I don’t think that’s a good idea.
TRAPP: Yo I’ve been rocking with dude for a minute now, yea the way I was outed was fucked up but I would have eventually had to do it one way or another and when he messed with dude we wasn’t together, it’s how he handled it after the fact was fucked up. Chill sis just give him a chance, he not a bad dude.
AMAYA: I don’t know Ashaan, I just think he’s a little messy that’s all. But I won’t cut him out just yet, I always remember him being around when we’re growing up but people changes as they get older.
TRAPP: If it don’t work then I can walk away saying I tried and move on with my life. I can always come back here and pick things back up, my mindset is in a totally different place right now and I rather you and the kids have your own space.
AMAYA: Once I start working again bro, I promise I’ll pay you back.
TRAPP: Chill sis, I got you. Let me finish up here though because I’m going to Jalen’s house in a little bit. I’ll get the tickets today and I’ll cash app you some money to hold you down and we can get you out here sometime this week.
AMAYA: As much as I am angry at mom, I think I should tell her though.
TRAPP: That’s your decision, she’ll probably blame me and say I’m taking everyone away from her but who wants to be around and watch her self destruct.
AMAYA: You are right, I probably won’t see her anyway since I told her I didn’t have any money for her. But I’ll let you go and I’ll see you soon.
Like I said before I would do anything for my sister, with all the shit going on in both of our lives she was always one person I could count on. I remember coming out to her, she really didn’t believe me at first and then she asked me if I was sure.
I told her Nah but I did tell her that I was messing with Jalen, she thought it was cute but with her finding out it was only making me uncomfortable. The way my sister found out was she saw a text Jalen had sent me and you sexting is huge when you young. I told her what was good and she promised me she wouldn’t say anything.
As she didn’t.
Shit she was helping me sneak Jalen in the crib at night sometimes. So she has the same love for the kid she just don’t like how he went about things but that was up to her if she wanted to forgive him or not.
November 12th, 2012
Philadelphia, PA
Trapp’s Parents House
8:30 AM
FLASHBACK
(Off-Camera)
Philadelphia, PA
Trapp’s Parents House
8:30 AM
FLASHBACK
(Off-Camera)
The scene opens up the morning after, Jalen is shown lying with his head on Trapp’s chest. He struggles to open his eyes, reaching for his phone he notices the condom wrapper at the end of the bed along with his underwear.
JALEN HOLMES: Shit!
Jalen jumps up out of the bed waking Trapp up. Trapp rises up looking at Jalen wondering why he was panicking.
TRAPP: What’s wrong?
JALEN HOLMES: It’s after 8 and I’m still here, my mom is going to kill me.
TRAPP: Just tell her you stayed here bruh, I’m sure she’ll understand.
JALEN HOLMES: And then she’ll wonder why I didn’t call her and tell her or why I even left out in the middle of the night without saying anything. You don’t know my mom man she’s so over protective over me, she’s probably flipping right now.
Jalen notices a text from his mother letting him now breakfast was on the table and she left out early for work. Jalen lets out a sigh of relief as he falls back to the bed.
JALEN HOLMES: Nevermind she didn’t even notice I was gone.
TRAPP: You see you tripping for nothing nigga, now come back and lay with a nigga.
Jalen smiles and he walks back over to the bed, he climbs back in the bed with Trapp placing his head Back on his chest. Trapp wraps his arm around Jalen’s body rubbing on his butt.
TRAPP: That shit was good last night, felt like pussy forreal and You was tight.
Jalen blushes.
JALEN HOLMES: Don’t say that, ugh I hate that word.
TRAPP: What pussy? Your crazy bruh. But nah I need some of that before you go though.
JALEN HOLMES: Nigga I felt like a rape victim last night, I could barely handle all that and you want me to go again? This is not a pussy and I need a waiting period.
TRAPP: I’ll go slow bruh, that shit just felt way too good, like I wanted to just lay in that ass.
JALEN HOLMES: Forreal Trapp What are we doing? Like what are we?
Shit I didn’t know what we were doing and I really wasn’t trying to put any labels on anything, all I know was I liked Jalen and even though these feelings i was having was really fucking with me, being around Jalen felt good.
I wasn’t the relationship type of nigga, I’ve had my few here and there but those were with females and I Was never faithful so I wouldn’t even know how to be with a nigga.
And something told me Jalen would catch feelings quick, I mean who wouldn’t? I was a good looking dude, good dick and I had money.
That’s what matters right?
JALEN HOLMES: Like are we together or what are we?
TRAPP: I don’t know yet, you have to be patient with me yo and let me figure shit out. All I know is I don’t want you fucking with no other niggas, that shit is mines.
Trapp smacks Jalen’s ass.
TRAPP: All mines.
JALEN HOLMES: But what about you? No more females.
TRAPP: Whoa wait a minute I don’t know about all that homie, like I said be patient with me. I don’t even know if I’m gay. I was curious I like what we did and I want to see what’s up with it but as for completely changing right now I don’t think I can do it.
I could see that Jalen was getting restless and annoyed by the answers I was giving him. But I was only keeping it real with him, I don’t think I could just up and stop fucking with bitches.
Yeah it was probably selfish of me to ask him to stop fucking other niggas but the way that ass felt and the fact I had some feelings for the nigga wanted him exclusively to me and no one else.
Like I would probably fight a nigga maybe hurt someone over him. I just wanted to make the nigga happy.
TRAPP: You mad now?
JALEN HOLMES: No I’m not, I guess I get it and i can understand how you must feel in this moment but I just don’t want to get hurt either.
TRAPP: I won’t hurt you nigga, trust me. I feel like we’re going to be each other's lives a long time forreal but on the real what’s good with them cakes tho?
JALEN HOLMES: Ugh boy.
Jalen laughs lifting the blanket up and going underneath, Trapp lays back as the scene fades.
FLASHBACK END
JALEN HOLMES: Shit!
Jalen jumps up out of the bed waking Trapp up. Trapp rises up looking at Jalen wondering why he was panicking.
TRAPP: What’s wrong?
JALEN HOLMES: It’s after 8 and I’m still here, my mom is going to kill me.
TRAPP: Just tell her you stayed here bruh, I’m sure she’ll understand.
JALEN HOLMES: And then she’ll wonder why I didn’t call her and tell her or why I even left out in the middle of the night without saying anything. You don’t know my mom man she’s so over protective over me, she’s probably flipping right now.
Jalen notices a text from his mother letting him now breakfast was on the table and she left out early for work. Jalen lets out a sigh of relief as he falls back to the bed.
JALEN HOLMES: Nevermind she didn’t even notice I was gone.
TRAPP: You see you tripping for nothing nigga, now come back and lay with a nigga.
Jalen smiles and he walks back over to the bed, he climbs back in the bed with Trapp placing his head Back on his chest. Trapp wraps his arm around Jalen’s body rubbing on his butt.
TRAPP: That shit was good last night, felt like pussy forreal and You was tight.
Jalen blushes.
JALEN HOLMES: Don’t say that, ugh I hate that word.
TRAPP: What pussy? Your crazy bruh. But nah I need some of that before you go though.
JALEN HOLMES: Nigga I felt like a rape victim last night, I could barely handle all that and you want me to go again? This is not a pussy and I need a waiting period.
TRAPP: I’ll go slow bruh, that shit just felt way too good, like I wanted to just lay in that ass.
JALEN HOLMES: Forreal Trapp What are we doing? Like what are we?
Shit I didn’t know what we were doing and I really wasn’t trying to put any labels on anything, all I know was I liked Jalen and even though these feelings i was having was really fucking with me, being around Jalen felt good.
I wasn’t the relationship type of nigga, I’ve had my few here and there but those were with females and I Was never faithful so I wouldn’t even know how to be with a nigga.
And something told me Jalen would catch feelings quick, I mean who wouldn’t? I was a good looking dude, good dick and I had money.
That’s what matters right?
JALEN HOLMES: Like are we together or what are we?
TRAPP: I don’t know yet, you have to be patient with me yo and let me figure shit out. All I know is I don’t want you fucking with no other niggas, that shit is mines.
Trapp smacks Jalen’s ass.
TRAPP: All mines.
JALEN HOLMES: But what about you? No more females.
TRAPP: Whoa wait a minute I don’t know about all that homie, like I said be patient with me. I don’t even know if I’m gay. I was curious I like what we did and I want to see what’s up with it but as for completely changing right now I don’t think I can do it.
I could see that Jalen was getting restless and annoyed by the answers I was giving him. But I was only keeping it real with him, I don’t think I could just up and stop fucking with bitches.
Yeah it was probably selfish of me to ask him to stop fucking other niggas but the way that ass felt and the fact I had some feelings for the nigga wanted him exclusively to me and no one else.
Like I would probably fight a nigga maybe hurt someone over him. I just wanted to make the nigga happy.
TRAPP: You mad now?
JALEN HOLMES: No I’m not, I guess I get it and i can understand how you must feel in this moment but I just don’t want to get hurt either.
TRAPP: I won’t hurt you nigga, trust me. I feel like we’re going to be each other's lives a long time forreal but on the real what’s good with them cakes tho?
JALEN HOLMES: Ugh boy.
Jalen laughs lifting the blanket up and going underneath, Trapp lays back as the scene fades.
FLASHBACK END
October 2nd, 2017
Atlanta, GA
Black Studios
9:50 PM
(On-Camera)
Atlanta, GA
Black Studios
9:50 PM
(On-Camera)
All the shit that’s been going on in my life has been a lot to deal with. So when I’m not dealing with life shift then I’m somewhere smoking a blunt and writing some music.
Music always been my life, ever since I was a young one out on Broad street for some money so I could add to my in home studio. Or doing the school talent shows or adult talents show like I was out this bitch grinding and working hard trying to make a name for myself.
I’ve been in the studio all day and my nigga Micah said he was in town. I met him a few months ago on a joint track we did for this artist named Dutchess. He was going through kind of what I was going through at that time and he dropped some real knowledge on me so of course he wanted to link up and see what we could come up with in the studio.
But shit I was going to pick his brain a bit and see if a nigga could get some sort of advice on what the fuck I was going through at the moment. I didn’t have many friends especially here in Atlanta, most of the people I fuck with was back home in Philly and the people Jalen ran around with was more fake friends than real friends.
MICAH GRAY: Yea that shit I dope, I fucks with the beat too.
TRAPP: I mixed that shit this morning, been in here all day forreal.
MICAH GRAY: Shit I’m trying to jump on that if I can.
TRAPP: Bruh I was thinking the same shit that’s why I asked you to come here.
MICAH GRAY: But you talking about you been in here all day and shit what you recording an album or something nigga? Or you avoiding home or some shit?
TRAPP: I mean a little of both, the studio been my home forreal. I don’t know if you know my nigga Jalen but we just having some problems that’s all, I moved out but just moved back in.
MICAH GRAY: Well That right there tells you this relationship means something. Usually when niggas pack they shit and move out they done but you back in the bitch.
TRAPP: I know right, that nigga betrayed my trust forreal and I’m just mad.
MICAH GRAY: You holding onto something that probably ain’t that serious. So all this time y’all spending being mad at each other could be spent on some positive shit. Be smart bruh because you got a lot of shit going for you right now and that relationship shit should be a breeze.
Micah was spitting that real shit to me right now, I don’t know why I was still holding onto that shit forreal and I know Jalen was beating himself up going out his way to prove to me that it’s only about me.
It’s crazy because I only told Micah bits and pieces of what was going on, but he automatically called me out on my shit and told me stop worrying about something that’s not nothing. As crazy as that sounded it was real shit.
We older now, we getting money, and we were in a much different place than we were back in the day so I wanted to enjoy this shit and not be mad.
MICAH GRAY: Trust me nigga it’s good to have someone, you don’t want to be like me in the bars on these social media apps.
TRAPP: The fuck? It’s bad enough I got a Twitter and Jalen begged me to do that shit. I try and stay low key and away from that shit.
MICAH GRAY: I jump on to promote my music or when I was doing the show but that’s about it. I’m not knocking social media because it’s helped me and my career though. But you're going to be alright playa, I wouldn’t even sweat it. Be happy you going through this shit because look at the music you putting out.
TRAPP: I feel you. We still rocking together and shit, like I said I moved back in the crib so I’ll see how things go. He mad with me though because I’ve been in the studio so I’ll probably go to the crib real quick, spend some time with him, give him some dick and come back to the studio.
MICAH GRAY: Damn it’s like that nigga?
TRAPP: Ha my nigga a freak.
The two laugh as the scene fades to black.
Music always been my life, ever since I was a young one out on Broad street for some money so I could add to my in home studio. Or doing the school talent shows or adult talents show like I was out this bitch grinding and working hard trying to make a name for myself.
I’ve been in the studio all day and my nigga Micah said he was in town. I met him a few months ago on a joint track we did for this artist named Dutchess. He was going through kind of what I was going through at that time and he dropped some real knowledge on me so of course he wanted to link up and see what we could come up with in the studio.
But shit I was going to pick his brain a bit and see if a nigga could get some sort of advice on what the fuck I was going through at the moment. I didn’t have many friends especially here in Atlanta, most of the people I fuck with was back home in Philly and the people Jalen ran around with was more fake friends than real friends.
MICAH GRAY: Yea that shit I dope, I fucks with the beat too.
TRAPP: I mixed that shit this morning, been in here all day forreal.
MICAH GRAY: Shit I’m trying to jump on that if I can.
TRAPP: Bruh I was thinking the same shit that’s why I asked you to come here.
MICAH GRAY: But you talking about you been in here all day and shit what you recording an album or something nigga? Or you avoiding home or some shit?
TRAPP: I mean a little of both, the studio been my home forreal. I don’t know if you know my nigga Jalen but we just having some problems that’s all, I moved out but just moved back in.
MICAH GRAY: Well That right there tells you this relationship means something. Usually when niggas pack they shit and move out they done but you back in the bitch.
TRAPP: I know right, that nigga betrayed my trust forreal and I’m just mad.
MICAH GRAY: You holding onto something that probably ain’t that serious. So all this time y’all spending being mad at each other could be spent on some positive shit. Be smart bruh because you got a lot of shit going for you right now and that relationship shit should be a breeze.
Micah was spitting that real shit to me right now, I don’t know why I was still holding onto that shit forreal and I know Jalen was beating himself up going out his way to prove to me that it’s only about me.
It’s crazy because I only told Micah bits and pieces of what was going on, but he automatically called me out on my shit and told me stop worrying about something that’s not nothing. As crazy as that sounded it was real shit.
We older now, we getting money, and we were in a much different place than we were back in the day so I wanted to enjoy this shit and not be mad.
MICAH GRAY: Trust me nigga it’s good to have someone, you don’t want to be like me in the bars on these social media apps.
TRAPP: The fuck? It’s bad enough I got a Twitter and Jalen begged me to do that shit. I try and stay low key and away from that shit.
MICAH GRAY: I jump on to promote my music or when I was doing the show but that’s about it. I’m not knocking social media because it’s helped me and my career though. But you're going to be alright playa, I wouldn’t even sweat it. Be happy you going through this shit because look at the music you putting out.
TRAPP: I feel you. We still rocking together and shit, like I said I moved back in the crib so I’ll see how things go. He mad with me though because I’ve been in the studio so I’ll probably go to the crib real quick, spend some time with him, give him some dick and come back to the studio.
MICAH GRAY: Damn it’s like that nigga?
TRAPP: Ha my nigga a freak.
The two laugh as the scene fades to black.